


Teenage Dream

by tappret43



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, John gets moirail-zoned, John is so vanilla im warning you now, Multiple times, This is lowkey a songfic but yknow, Vriska is bad at humans, background davekat, background rosemary - Freeform, its not actually one, just loosely based on a song
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-08-08 01:57:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7738987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tappret43/pseuds/tappret43
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your resolution is to actually tell her how you feel, lest your feelings eat you up inside until you do. Then have the rejection eat you up immediately after.</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>Oh, whatever. You have a whole year to cross that bridge.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>--------</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Alternating POV's and lots of friendzoning. Proceed with caution.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You think I'm pretty without any makeup on

You stare at your reflection in the bathroom mirror and frown. You squint your eyes and look closer, examining your eyelashes and lips. They're not blue enough. You carelessly reach down onto the sink counter for your mascara and when you don't feel it in its usual spot, you panic. When you look down, you don't even see your lipstick! All of your makeup is missing from the counter!

A quick two-minute ravaging of your bathroom cabinet later, you come to the conclusion that you've either horribly misplaced all of your makeup, or your bath-roommate threw it away. You fought very hard to get your own private bathroom in the nine story hive your friends built for everybody– it's honestly more of a hotel, or a tall mansion– but _noooooooo_. Four bedrooms and two bathrooms per floor. That means everyone has to share. You thought you made it perfectly clear that Terezi, Kanaya, and Karkat could easily share a bathroom, but that idea didn't get much backing from the others.

You were lucky enough at least to get to vote on who your floor-mates would be, and you gladly chose Terezi, while Karkat and Kanaya chose each other. The four of you were put on the fifth floor, and you were designated the bathroom to share with Terezi. She wouldn't throw away your makeup, would she? She also wouldn't have used it, because she has no use for it. For one, she is blind, and it's also all cerulean. She never liked that color very much.

You groan at your misfortune and kick the trash can in frustration. Your stomach growls and you frown deeper. You _never_ go to breakfast in the morning without your face done. Oh well. You're just going to have to sit near people who won't notice or won't care– and even if they do it won't matter. You'll _make_ them stop caring.

With a huff, you grab your hairbrush and go back to your room to accessorize. A lady's never fully dressed without a- _oh forget it._ You throw on a black house dress and your glasses and get ready to face the day. Or at least stuff your face with whatever's been laid out on the table.

You take the stairs down to the dining room, just in case you bump into anyone on the elevator. You really don't want to have a conversation with anyone stupid while you're this cranky, and you haven't had your coffee yet. Best morning ever! You finally make it to the “East Dining Hall” as Kanaya so eloquently refers to it, and take a seat between two empty chairs.

“Good morning, Vriska!” You turn your head and see John standing with a plate piled high with various American breakfast foods. “Is this seat taken?” Like the gentleman he is, he waits for an answer with that almost unbearably chipper grin and eagerly sits down next to you when you shake your head.

You put your elbows up on the table and rest your chin in your hands as you watch John serve you your favorite– waffles with blueberries and honey. He carefully lowers them on his shiny fork and drops them onto your pristine porcelain meal tray. You two engage in idle conversation while you poke the berries with your fork.You count out exactly eight. This boy is too good to you.

After a few minutes he quiets down and taps the edge of your plate with his fork.

“Everything okay?” he asks, a look of sincere concern on his face. You attack his fork with your own, fitting the prongs together until you hear it scratching against the plate.

“Yeah, I'm fine,” you say, looking totally not fine. Terezi often mentions how melodramatic you can be, but you think the disappearance of your expensive cosmetics warrants a little bit of attitude. “I just lost my makeup.”

He raises an eyebrow and pulls his fork away from yours, diving instead at a blueberry. “That sucks.”

It isn't much, but those two words make you feel a very familiar feeling that you get around John. You do nothing to deserve his praise and friendship, but he's always right next to you to support you, even when you're being a bitch.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I think you still look pretty without your makeup.”

You spare a glance at him as he brings the fork up to your lips. You can't help but smile at his comment and graciously open your mouth for him to feed you. He daintily touches your lip with the tip of his fork and you scrape your front teeth across the prongs, pulling the berry off. _This boy is too good to you._

He lets you eat the rest of your breakfast yourself and you find yourself scooting your chair a little closer to his. The rest of the meal is filled with bad jokes and funny stories. You forgot how much you love his laugh.

When you finally part with John and go upstairs again, you catch a glimpse of your reflection in the mirror. You make different faces at yourself and smile.

Maybe you'll put off buying more makeup for a while.


	2. You think I'm funny when I tell the punchline wrong

You set your empty glass down on the coffee table and sit back on the sofa. You see Roxy wink at you when she picks it up and carries it back to the bar for a refill. You sort of love having an open bar in the basement– well, as open as it can be without being too enabling for Rose, Roxy, and Gamzee. But it’s New Year’s Eve, so you all figured you'd let up on the rules a bit tonight.

Sitting beside you is your friend Vriska, who just downed her third rum and Coke. She giggles at something Dave says and leans against your side. Her laugh can only be described as a cackle, but you don't mind it. Something clicks in your fuzzy mind and you decide you want her to laugh some more.

You tell a shitty joke.

“Knock knock,” you offer, and Jade is quick to take the bait.

“Oh! Who is there?” She's sitting next to Davepeta with her legs stretched out across their lap. Sometimes those two are just too cute.

“You gonna call.” Vriska looks up at you with drunken childlike wonder and Dave facepalms so hard you think he might have hurt himself.

Jade gives you a knowing smile and rolls her eyes. “You gonna call _who_?”

You grin and say “Ghostbusters” like it's shouted in the song. Vriska hesitated for a second then busts out laughing. If she weren't basically glued to your side, you'd be worried that she was going to fall off the sofa.

All of your other friends, however, are much less impressed with your bad joke. Terezi actually says “boo!” and you and Vriska both laugh when Jane implies that Terezi was, herself, a ghost.

Vriska must have been inspired by your joke, because she sits up straight to tell her own, putting her hands up and saying “wait, okay.” She faces you and you find yourself smiling fondly at her.

“Why did-” Another fit of laughter that some others laugh at. “Why did the spider go on the _web_ site?” It takes her a second before she realizes she spoiled her own joke. 

“Shit!” She frowns but can't keep a straight face for very long because you're already laughing with her despite her slip up. She punches your shoulder as lightly as she can (which isn't very) and you wrap your arms around her waist. It all feels like a moment between you and Vriska until Kanaya stands up and takes Rose by the hand back upstairs. You think you saw her frowning, but you're too busy having your cheek nuzzled by Vriska to care. You don't understand what happened between the three, but Vriska doesn't like talking about it, so you dropped it.

The others soon follow suit and disperse to their respective rooms. You exchange a somewhat unsettling look with Terezi as she stands up. You and her have both been awkwardly dancing around the position as Vriska's moirail for quite some time, not to mention your kismessitude is still just starting out. Troll romance sure is confusing.

After some time spent with Vriska asking you silly questions and sleepily running her hands through your hair, you help Vriska into the elevator and up to her floor. Like the gentleman and New-Year’s enthusiast you are, you let her kiss wherever on your face she can accurately locate, even though it's likely well past midnight. You say good-night and she invites you in for a “nice little snuggle session,” but you politely decline and go down to your room, feeling elated and fuzzy. You have a feeling it isn't just the booze.

As you strip off your jeans and shirt and crawl into the warmth of your bed, you can't get Vriska out of your mind– not that you really care to. You fondly touch the spot on the corner of your mouth that she smeared with blue lipstick before wiping it off halfheartedly. You wonder briefly if she still would have tried to kiss you if she had been sober, but it isn't long before you drift off with her face sweetly in the back of your mind.

The next morning, you aren't surprised to find that your glasses are underneath you and you've got lipstick all over your wrist. You carefully move your glasses to your bedside table and let your head fall back into your pillow, thinking. Your resolution is to actually tell her how you feel, lest your feelings eat you up inside until you do. Then have the rejection eat you up immediately after.

…

Oh, whatever. You have a whole year to cross that bridge.


	3. Every February, you'll be my Valentine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Casually published a chapter about Valentine's Day in August  
> Enjoy!

“Hey, Nepeta, pass me the glue?”

You shake your hand free of loose glitter and wipe it on the carpet next to you. At least it isn't blood, you think. Since coming to Earth multicolored blood has been in short supply so Nepeta found a new interest in glitter, glue, and everything in between. Why you enlisted her help in the first place escapes you, but as you stare at the heart shaped piece of red construction paper you smile to yourself. She is pretty skilled with arts and crafts, you'll give her that.

She doesn't look up from her drawing (that you assume will go to Equius, given the several pink diamonds scribbled on it) as she picks the glue bottle up and extends her arm out to you. You take it from her slowly– John is always on your ass about being polite, and that includes not snatching things from people. You've tried explaining that you're a thief and that's what you do, but he still gives you a frown that could put a crying little wiggler to shame. Damn that frown. With that in mind, you take the bottle of glue and carefully start letting it drip along a heart you sketched. You haven't had the “quadrant talk” with John quite yet, but Nepeta has assured you that hearts are a safe shape for Valentine’s day, no matter the nature of the relationship.

You have to start over twice and get more glitter from the bins across the room before you're happy enough with your card to deliver it. Still, you think it isn't as good as you wanted it to be. John's an awesome friend who deserves an even _awesomer_ card, assuming anything can even be more awesome than him. Unlikely.

“Alright, let's get this over with,” you grumble as you pick up your single card. While Nepeta has made a card for everybody– even those she doesn't like– your relationships with the others in the house are much more… well, complicated. You wouldn't dare give _Terezi_ a card with a heart or a diamond on it. You two have been in a silent agreement to not pursue a red romance with each other. You two are better off as friends anyway, you think. Besides, you've got way too many irons in the fire for relationships like that, anyway. Is anybody else in this house as willing to sacrifice feelings jams and recreational sex as you? _You seriously doubt it._

You put it in an envelope and seal it with a kiss. Okay, you seal it with glue, but you kiss it anyway. You're glad you didn't wear your lipstick today. It might be a little weird if John saw a human redrom gesture splayed out in bright cobalt on a card already covered in hearts. After the card is sealed and signed, you reach into the bowl of lollipops that Nepeta has laid out between you two. You awkwardly tie the lollipop to the card with ribbon, and Nepeta looks a little concerned, but quickly resumes her coloring, leaving you to your own creative mess.

Once you realize you don’t have to wait for Nepeta to deliver your card, you promptly stand up, dust glitter off your dress, and say goodbye to your friend. She gives you a little wave without looking up from her crayons and you take your leave. Since you’re on the sixth floor, you decide to take the elevator down to the ground floor where the living areas and kitchen are. John is sure to be down there, and even if he isn’t, his room is just a short flight of stairs up from the ground floor.

You hurry to the button on the wall to call the elevator- you think it’s a little lame how excited you are about some silly human holiday, but you’ve been learning to enjoy little bits and pieces of earth culture as they present themselves. You finally hop in the elevator and soon enough, the doors open and you’re greeted with decorations from wall to wall and hanging from the ceiling.

Oh, Christ. Looks like you weren’t the only ones looking forward to Valentine’s Day. You turn away from the stairs in front of you and find yourself looking at Dave Strider. He nods a greeting at you and resumes what he was doing before you came downstairs, which appears to be arranging flowers in a crystalline vase. You watch him place a heart-shaped note between roses and decide not to question it. You do, however, make a face at him apparently, because as soon as he turns back around he rolls his eyes and explains that it’s for Karkat. You nod condescendingly and proceed to the living- er, the _lounge area_ , leaving Dave alone and flustered in the corridor.

As you walk through the doorway, you’re greeted by a small bunch of friends. Meulin waves from the loveseat, on which she’s sitting with Kurloz. It looks like they’ve been sticking heart stickers on each other. You wave back hesitantly and scan the room for John. You don’t see him, but- lucky for you- you catch someone else’s eye. Just what you needed. More roadblocks.

“Oh, Vriska! There you are!” Jane Crocker excuses herself from her conversation and makes her way to you. You give her a quick once over and absentmindedly tuck your thumbs into where your pockets would be, if you were wearing pants. You never really see the resemblance when you look at John and Jane. Jane has gracious curves, whereas John is quite thinner, though their coloring is identical. Light smooth skin, dark chocolate waves, and striking blue eyes. Hers aren't as nice as John’s, you think.

“Now, I have been lookin’ all over for you!” You raise an eyebrow as she picks stray hairs and lint off of your white dress. “Look at yourself, all covered in this stuff. I'm not about to let you woo my brother lookin’ untidy like this!” You gently push her off of you and adjust your glasses.

“Whoa, what? No no no no no, I-” Jane cuts you off with a finger to your lips. She shakes her head and you're even more confused.

“Just get on with it, already! He's in the ballroom with Feferi, I think. Now get!” She takes her finger off your lips and shoos you off. This is just ridiculous.

“Crocker, did you set something up? Who told you- what are you doing?” She blinks innocently and gives you the cherry red smirk that you know means she's scheming. Like brother, like sister, you suppose.

“Don't fuss over it, Vriska. I didn't do anything! I just…” She sighs and places a friendly hand on your shoulder. “I'm glad John has someone who makes him as happy as you do.” You put aside how that sentence makes you feel so you can nod and smile at Jane. It feels a little like you're getting her blessing. Without another word, you two exchange a look and go your separate ways.

A few people glance at you when you walk right back out of the room and head over to the expansive north hall. In the house’s original design, it was meant to be a grand foyer-slash-ballroom. The heels of your boots click against the marble floor and echo between the high, adorned walls. Its Elizabethan elegance, with crystal chandeliers and tall, arched windows, has been covered with heart decals and streamers have been draped across the room and spun around the standing candelabras. You've never kept a tidy space, but even _you_ can tell that this is crossing some sort of artistic line.

Once you can peel your eyes off of the decorations, you spot John dancing with Feferi. She’s teaching him, you presume. You carefully make your way over to the couple and announce your presence. “Am I interrupting something?” You see John grin when he looks at you, and Feferi just beams at both of you and leaves.

He stands awkwardly and says ”hi”, and it takes a minute for you to work up the guts to go to him. You take his hand in yours and put his other high on your waist. Thankfully, he's already started music– classical piano. Just when you thought he couldn't get any dorkier. You don't notice if anybody else comes in after that.


	4. Don't ever look back

The smell of her perfume swims in your head as you shut your eyes and run a hand through your hair. Your sides tingle as you remember the feeling of her fingernails dragging across them while she kissed your lips, before they were abruptly taken away. Alone you stand in the ballroom, a romantic waltz serenading you from a speaker halfway across the floor. For the first time in a while you find yourself wondering if you really were just a moirail to her.

She was all you could think of for weeks and you finally had her, dancing in your arms. It was all perfect: the way her eyes squint and fangs poke at her lip when she smiles, how soft her usually-brash voice could get when she’s concerned. Her hands were on your cheeks and yours were around her waist, and everything felt right. Maybe you felt like it was a dream, or you were feeling like taking a risk, but you kissed her.

Drunk off of her smile, you held her in a dip, the two of you breathing in the other’s breath until she spoke. Her eyes were wide and she choked out an apology after she hastily withdrew her hands from your body. She didn't wait for your forgiveness and you didn't even get to question what she had to feel sorry about before she pushed herself out of your arms and onto her feet. She didn't look back as she ran through the door and out of sight.

You hold back tears as you shamefully retrieve your phone from the speaker and pick up the card she gave you. Attached to the pink envelope is a blueberry lollipop, but you really don't have the heart to open it or the card itself. You hold the envelope and sniff, still fighting the urge to just get it out now and cry in the middle of the dancing hall. Regaining (some of) your composure, however, you walk out of the room and up to your floor where you're greeted by Jade and Dave.

They exchange worried looks and Dave nods at her and offers you a sympathetic half-smile before stepping back into his room and closing the door. Jade asks if you're okay, her fluffy, white ears folded back in timidness, and when you don't reply, you swear you hear her heart breaking. She steps forward and wraps her arms around you, and you cling desperately to the little pride that you have left. You stand stiff in her arms and she lets you go. She nods to her door and looks at you with the most pitying eyes, inviting you in to talk about whatever it was that happened. You smile at her and sniff again, holding the card a little looser in your hands, then shake your head. She smiles softly and kisses your cheek before going into her own room, respecting your privacy. Good cousin, best friend.

You squeeze your eyes shut and take a shaky deep breath, then turn and go to your bedroom. You see that Rose’s light is off and figure she's celebrating with Kanaya. Well, at least someone got to enjoy Valentine's Day. You also wonder why Dave wasn't with Karkat, but a quick glance at your phone tells you. It's 10:17 PM and those two don't sleep together. You don't know if it's a not-ready-yet thing or something about celibacy like Karkat's ancestor, but they seem happy so you never asked.

Another glance at your phone tells you that you have a message from Terezi, but none from Vriska. As you walk to your room, you open the message and read it.

**H3Y JOHN. 1 DONT KNOW WH4T H4PPEN3D W1TH YOU 4ND VR1SK4 (SH3 WONT T4LK 4BOUT 1T >:[ ) BUT 1 H4V3 4 F33L1NG YOU TWO SHOULD  T4LK.**

_Well that happened quickly_ , you think. _And very polite words coming from her_. There’s more written:

**OH 4ND 1F 1T TURNS OUT YOU 4CTU4LLY HURT H3R, YOUD B3TT3R W4TCH YOUR FUCK1NG B4CK.**

That's more like it. You briefly wonder if this is her way of cancelling your date this weekend, but then you look closer at the message and feel your stomach sink. Vriska is at Terezi, telling her that she's hurt. You hurt her. You crossed a line no moirail should ever cross. Hell, you aren't even that. Terezi’s the one comforting her right now!

You screwed this up big time. An aching part of you is telling you to find Vriska and apologize until your voice is raw, but you're so overwhelmed by the whole situation that you can't bring yourself to make any movements. You only notice that you aren't even out of the doorway when you hear someone clear their throat behind you. You jump and turn to see Rose staring at you worriedly, your vision blurry with tears.

“John…?” She wrings her hands and you sniff a little. You blink a few tears away, sending them running down your cheeks. Rose looks honestly confused, but you don’t really register if she asks you what happened. You just stand there, frozen. You hate crying in front of your friends, especially when when it’s over something that was completely your fault, like this.

She sighs, but you can tell it's more motherly than irritated. She walks towards you and wraps her arms around you, an embrace that you actually let yourself return. You shamefully bury your face in her shoulder and cry. The world feels like it's caving in on you, and your body is begging you to take deep breaths. Burning behind your immediate thoughts of “why?” “how?” and “no” is your own voice telling you that you don't deserve comfort right now.

You have a feeling Rose has picked up on this, but doesn't care. You and your friends occasionally pick on her for acting so parental sometimes, but the physical comfort is really nice, you've realized. Not that you'd ever admit it. After a few minutes of holding you, she releases you and lets you get some sleep. She gives you a soft kiss on the cheek and turns off your light as she exits your room.

It's too quiet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, Giga, for letting me know about my numbering mistake!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> The rest of the chapters are going to be around the same length, and I plan on updating frequently. Let me know what you think in the comments!


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